Men: Reflect On What You Are About To Read

• Am I striving to be the best I can as an “attraction marketer“? Absolutely.
• Do I desire to accomplish my business goals for the purpose of enhancing my life and the lives of those I influence in a positive manner?  Absolutely.

However…

Even though I am sixty-four and the children do not live in my home, I do know one thing for sure: I never want to hear anything like this…

“Well, pops, I’m glad you ‘made it’ as a business person during this transition period of your life where you went from being in ministry in the educational realm to being a successful online marketer.  I’m glad for you.  But somewhere along the line your attraction for us kids dropped off — way off — and we took second place to you as a dad.”

I don’t know you, you aspirations or your drives and how they are being handled at this stage of your life: and I certainly don’t have to.

But one thing for sure: I do know that if you are a dad now or planning on being one, I would encourage you to thoughtfully read the article below.

It may be far from the best you may ever read, but I simply don’t care.  What matters to me is that you sense the heartbeat of the article, apply it to you in a positive manner at this stage of your, and use it as a motivation to keep on trying to be the best dad (or grandfather) you can while in the process of building the best possible business you can.

“Attraction Marketing Excellence:
On Being A Sensitive Dad”
© Lee Wise All rights reserved

A View From The Men’s Room

I could hardly believe what I was hearing. A father and his son had entered the men’s room. While I was washing my hands, I listened as the father wielded a series of demanding and demeaning statements at his son as if they were swords in a battle for … who knows what?

And all about going to the bathroom quickly!

It was the perfect victory.

• The enemy (the son) had been slain.
• The battle was won.
• The general had summoned his one-man army to do his bidding.

It was also totally and completely ridiculous. There was no consideration for the feelings or physical needs of the young person.

The “bad boy” had won the day — and the bad boy was not the son.

It was the son’s insensitive dad.

I Felt Sad And Angry

This incident occurred while on vacation. I loved vacation except for one aspect: watching fathers deal with their children.

I was sad.
And I was angry.

The “interesting” thing was that when I related this observation to my daughter and son-in-law, they proceeded to share with me their same discouragement while they were on a recent trip to a theme park.

Their message was the same:

“We had a great time. The only discouraging thing was seeing dads with their children.”

I Agree: It Is Far From Easy

I am a father and I would be among the first to declare that raising children is not an easy task.

Parts of it are rough. Real rough.

I would also be quick to admit the times I have failed as a father.  How could I not? I may have a few answers but that doesn’t mean I’ve lived them all..

• All time
• In all of the best possible ways.

But I do hope that no one has ever said this about me after observing my relationship with any of my children or grand children:

“We saw the most discouraging thing today. This guy was a jerk. The way he treated those kids was awful.  No respect. No honor. Only demands and unrealistic expectations. I tell ya, it was sad.”

There Is A Better Way… And As Dads We All Know It

Let me be quick to add…

All is not bad.

I have seen many loving, caring fathers throughout the years. I love watching those types of dads relate to their children. It is one of my personal delights in life

With that in mind, I am offering a few simple suggestions for a better way: a better way for fathers to relate to their children than the two negative examples I have shared with you.

I Will Center On Five Themes

1. Consideration

2. Respect

3. Humility

4. Compassion

5. Love

Two comments as I transition into my suggestions:

• You will quickly discover that this will not be a long and drawn out discussion of these themes. Enjoy.
• Many of the points will be shared through using simple “affirmations” — or descriptive comments if you please.

These affirmations will help you personalize what is said.

So…

We have discussed a few of the “bad boy” characteristics.

Let’s turn our attention to five characteristics of the “good boys.” That is, men who are determined *not* to be thought of as “one of those insensitive dads.”

Consideration

Consideration says…

“I adjust my expectations according to the needs, maturity level and emotional capabilities of the child I am relating to at the moment.”

Because of the important aspects of the statement you just read, I’m going to repeat it and break it down for you.

That’s my part.

Yours will be to reflect on each aspect as you read it one more time. Reflect on it through the lens of how you would have liked to be treated as a young-person-in-the-making. (The extra spaces are there by design to prompt reflection).

“I adjust

My expectations

According to

The needs,

Maturity level

And emotional capabilities

Of the child

I am relating to

At the moment.”

Respect

Respect says…

“I see this person entrusted to my care as one who is worthy of my honor, approval and love.”

This mental stance provides for me a frame. A frame I wrap around my child *to begin with.* The child is worthy of my honor, approval and love — from the beginning.

It is a part of the package each child should *sense* in me from “Day One” so-to-speak.

Humility

Humility says…

• “Because I am still learning, I give my child space and time to learn.”
• “Because I still fail, I forgive and support my child when he or she fails.”
• “Because I respond poorly when people are angry with me for reasons I do not understand, I resist all uncontrolled and self-centered anger when dealing with my child.”

Compassion

Compassion says…

• “I am a ’show and tell’ person. I show my child I care. I tell my child I care.”
• “I strive to be gentle, not harsh.”
• “I care and my child senses it.”

Love

Love says… all of the above.

A DISCLAIMER

Let me make something perfectly clear: children can — and do — hurt their parents: good parents.

Parents who in a very real sense lay down their lives for their kids and still get kicked in the guts while trying to help their children be happy and succeed in life.

These parents know a special kind of pain. A pain that no one really wants to understand. I salute those parents.

You may be one of them.

So my disclaimer is..

• I realize this is a two-sided fence
• My purpose is not to add guilt to a conscience already plagued by the “Why’s” of their child’s bad attitudes and behavior — in spite of hundreds of hours of trying to do what’s right.

Rather, if you happen to be one of those parents — and especially a dad since that is the topic of these comments — I want you to hear these words:

“I thank you for trying.”

I thank you for trying and for the lonely hours you have spent that only you, and possibly your spouse — and God — knows about…

The tears. The heartache and the pain that goes on and on as each new report surfaces about some action or attitude your child has displayed.

For those times, tears and heartache — I reflect to you my appreciation.

And I’m sure I represent only one of many voices that would echo the same to you if they could.

Therefore, review these comments and take note of each positive thing you have done.

• Take note.
• And take a bow.
• You deserve it.
• And we applaud you.

Yours for living a courageously beautiful life,

Lee

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© Lee Wise All All rights reserved. You may freely distribute this inspirational article. The copyright and this resource box must be included.

Lee is a writer an online marketer. With a passion for on purpose living and making a positive impact in the world, he seeks to encourage people in their personal and professional lives. http://attractionmarketingexcellence.com/blog

Subscribe to Lee’s ezine A Beautiful Moment In Time by sending a blank email to: beautifulmoment@aweber.com Remember to confirm your request!

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And Now That You Have Read And Reflected On A Few Things…

• Continue… either now or later.
• Reflect.
• Journal.
• Pray
• Act.

Like It? Then Share It!

Be a blessing and share it. Twitter, Facebook, send it… whatever.  I would appreciate it. And just maybe — just maybe — several sons or daughters may as well!

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Attraction Marketing Excellence Means Capturing Your Heart
© Lee Wise All rights reserved

You will hear me say in the video below on this subject, that it’s extremely important — or something to that effect.

I want to expand up on that just a bit here. It’s important because I see the essence of good, professional attraction marketing as always working toward the goal of “heart to heart” communication with our audience.

We look for ways to share who we are as persons with those who may be appreciate and identify with what we are marketing or communicating that we truly want them to heat.

In other words, we attempt to begin or continue a “heart to heart” relationship at some level.  This establishes a relationship, opens the door for building additional trust, and of course can lead to a long term relationship with and audience that are, at varying levels, friends.

Watch the video below.  Take notes.  And make comments if you like.

Quick: Strive For Three “Take Aways” From This Post and Ask…

1. Have I noticed anything on the heart level that I should respond to?
2. Looking in my recent past, what has captured my heart?  Have I recorded it in a journal where I could go back, “pull it up,” and use it to express “who I am” in any marketing setting?
3. Do I have any immediate impression after watching this video that I should note?

May you continue to be blessed in your attraction marketing — and personal life — journey!

Enjoy the day,

Lee

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